Being middle-aged is ...

Being middle-aged is ace...but it's a weird time of your life.
How are you supposed to act?
Am I supposed to stop doing certain things?
Am I supposed to take life more seriously?
....am I now required to be a keen gardener, keep up with the cricket scores and spend every Sunday lunch in a carvery wearing my ironed bootcut M&S jeans?

The only reason I haven't taken up fishing is....well....what is the fucking point of fishing?

.....and golf! Golf is for middle managers who like to wear lurid v-neck jumpers and Rupert the Bear pants. No thanks.

.....as for resigning myself to evenings sipping red wine in an attempt to look sophisticated while watching ITV...no thanks. I'll stick with my lager enjoyed straight from the tin while I'm jamming with the band.

....narrrh, middle-aged is no different than 33......but with a slightly more mature outlook and demeanour.
....that said, it's not easy to discern the difference between milestone and millstone when you dwell on the passing of years....
...and beware! Most people become old because they think they are.
....try and stay young! Embrace that retarded youthfulness when you feel the calling....but balance it with dignity and respect. 
....I dunno? I love acting the twat, but mostly, on an average day, you just quietly get shit done don't you.
Being middle-aged is ace.

....having said that, you do wake up with less erections in the mornings, and when you do, you're more concerned about emptying your bladder than anything else. You spend more time removing feckin' hair from your ears and nose than shaving your greying beard and wrinkly head...
...oddly, you spend far too much time choosing items from supermarket shelves, then forget the twatting thing you went in for?...
...and if you get a solid 8 hours undisturbed sleep without waking, then you're probably dead.

Mind you, along with the wisdom and realism of middle age comes a greater self-confidence and a serious lack of shit that you give about the judgement of others.
So long as the wrinkles and creases on your face are due to excessive laughing and your heart is eternally 16 years old, then fuck it. 

...thinking about it, I'd hate to be twenty years younger...being young today means growing an itchy hipster beard .......or listening to the irredeemably tiresome crap that's in the charts right now ..... or getting fucked up on ketamine and cheap vodka before overturning your pimped-up Fiesta into a hedge.
Stuff that. Being middle-aged is ace.

Being any age is ace! So long as you embody real values like honesty, integrity, hard work. Adding a bit of soul-enrichment and structure to our existence.
Life is the closest thing to magic we have.

So, I'll sign off with this - life is beautiful. Enjoy the absolute fuck out of it!
Even the shit bits.
Things get shit from time to time..obstacles..constant cul-de-sacs on an otherwise panoramic journey.
Work through it.
Perseverance.
Life gets ace again.
....and remember, the clock is ticking, and you can't halt the aging process by buying a flash car or getting a new haircut.
Time waits for no man.
So live in the moment.